The Big Three - Oh

Well, I'm now thirty.

They say that inside every thirty year old there's an eighteen year old wondering what the Hell happened and I have to say that at the moment that statement feels pretty accurate.

...

That doesn't mean I've killed and eaten an eighteen year old. Y'know, just to clarify that.

I suppose I should bleat on about being a responsible adult and how I'm looking back on my life and recognising the need to put aside childish things and move onwards and upwards with my life.

But the truth is... I don't feel my age.

Shit, I don't even feel like an adult!

I'm one of a growing breed. A thirty year old boy.

I like comics and video games and swearing and puerile humour every bit as much as I did as a teenager. In fact, moreso.

Despite the trappings of adulthood; mortgage, marriage, job, car, pension I'm every bit the angst riddled, self doubting, doe eyed simpleton trying to make sense of a world that seems to get a little bit more bewildering every day.
At first I thought that this was me. Some warped perspective borne out of emotional immaturity. Then I realised... This is how everyone feels.

The truth, kiddies, is that we grown ups are just as clueless and terrified as you are. The difference is that we're not allowed to admit it...
Plus we're bigger than you so we can beat you up.

As for my birthday festivities...

Well they surpassed my wildest expectations.

I left the house on Saturday morning expecting to go to Newcastle airport to fly to Berlin for a brief weekend of Bavarian fun. Imagine my surprise, then, when I went to visit my Mother-in-Law's place of work expecting to pick her up so she could drop us off at the airport and find nearly everyone I know bursting out of the woodwork yelling...

"SURPRIIIIIIISE!!!!"

Well, I certainly was surprised. In fact there are a plethora of photos on that Facebook thingy of the stupid face I pulled that I shan't re post here.

It was a wonderful evening and although a few important people couldn't make it (whom I've now burned in effigy and urinated onto the ashes) the amount of beautiful people that came from near and far just to spend the night with little-old-me moved me near to tears.

If you were one of those people then let me just thank you again from the bottom of my heart for making my Birthday Party so special.

Not to mention the absurdly abundant generosity of my friends, family and work colleagues who have showered me with awesome gifts and presents. Even a spectacularly sweet sixth former I teach was kind enough to come in from study leave to drop off a Batman birthday card with a Costa gift card in it.

And finally, of course, my beautiful wife Lauren.

I suppose I should be worried that I have a wife who's such an accomplished liar but to be honest I'm so bowled over that she went to such great effort and expense (even to the point of printing off fake e-tickets for out flight to Berlin) to give me such a glorious surprise, I'm literally lost for words.

Oh and we're still going to Berlin.

Compare your life to mine and weep, losers!